Top 10 Wrestling Bars/Schemes of All Time
“Wrestling bars never get old.” -PNut (PNut vs. Bonnie Godiva). This adage in battle rap has been echoed by many a fans, bloggers, analysts, and battle rappers themselves, and for the most part, it rings true. If you’re a male in America above the age of 18, odds are you’ll get a WWE Attitude era reference, and the bar/scheme will hit. Some rappers can even dip into newer wrestlers or older ones to get a reaction from the crowd. Salute those artists.
This list is a compilation of the top Wrestling bars to ever been spit on stage. Bars were chosen based on creativity, references used, and the uniqueness of the bar. I’ll be citing the battles the bars appear in, please check them out so these artists can get the buzz they deserve. Spoiler: No Goldberg/Spear or Owen Heart/Dying in the ring bars made this list unless they were part of an overall scheme.
Stepeasy’s WWE Scheme (Stepeasy vs. Mookie Wilson)
Shotty Horroh’s Wrestling Scheme (Shotty Horroh vs. Arsonal)
Hollow Da Don’s Hogan/Shirt Rip Bars (Hollow Da Don vs. Illmaculate)
10. Chess’ People’s Elbow Bar (Chess vs. Tay Roc)
“We ain’t see Roc put on an arm on Chess since the People’s Elbow.”
Personal and effective. Chess attempts to strip Tay Roc of his believability with his guns. Tay Roc is famous for using gun bars, so saying he’d never lay one on Chess is an excellent counter move. I’m not a massive fan of Chess/Chest bars usually, but this one worked.
9. Mackk Myron’s Raw Bar (Mackk Myron vs. Ooops)
“And we ain’t have a change of plans/ I watched my daddy come up off Raw like Shane McMahon.”
Mackk is known for being a puncher, and this punch hit hard. The setup was unusual for a wrestling bar, and the flow it was perfect.
8. Michael Ice’s Wrestling Scheme (Michael Ice vs. FnF Veg Villa)
“I want to have heart just like you/Putting on a Big Show like this will have your heartbreak kid trying to outshine Michael’s (Shawn Michaels)
This bar was a self-name flip that went hard. The scheme going into it wasn’t super amazing, but this haymaker at the end upped its potency. It may have been a bit of a reach in wordplay, but Michael was able to pull off the cadence of the bar and sell it.
7. MadFlex’s Triple H Bar (Madflex vs. E Farrel)
“Weak today, hot tomorrow/Most of what I spit goes overheads; I’m Triple H with that water bottle.”
Reading the bar doesn’t do it as much justice as it deserves in context. MadFlex’s flow going into this bar was smooth, and the reference is smoother. Anyone who grew up watching the Attitude era remembers Triple H’s entrance and his apron side dowsing of water to air. The entrance is iconic and a solid reference to use. The irony for those whose heads this went over.
6. Xcel Nakamura Bar (Xcel vs. C Moneii)
“John and Will knew you’d be tortured right/So they was pulling strings before I entered, I’m Nakamura nice.”
It could be personal preference showing, but I love one-liner that pack so much into them. Without knowing who Nakamura is, the meaning of the bar should be clear. However, if you have seen now the epic that was Nakamura’s entrance theme music in New Japan Pro Wrestling and WWE NXT, then this bar hits even harder. Excellent way to be subtle with your bars.
5. Tsu Surf’s WWE Name Flip Bars (Tsu Surf vs. Hitman Holla)
“You was watching wrestling Raw, Rock, Chyna, Smackdown/ We was in the trap raw, rock, China getting smacked down.”
The bookend to an already tremendous third round by Surf, this bar rocked the crowd at the end. Surf’s bar is a personal haymaker with a nice WWE flip in there? Sounds like a perfect recipe for success in battle rap.
4. Shotty Horroh Scheme (Shotty Horroh vs. Arsonal II)
Standout Bar: “Poppin’ cans like an Austin match/Shit sounds like Ric Flair slappin’ chops when the chopper slaps.”
Shotty has to be top 3 when it comes to wrestling bars and scheme use, and for the majority, they hit pretty well. This scheme, however, was very well put together and interwove new and old references. While not as intricate as some references on the list, the pure aggression and delivery make this scheme stand out.
3. Xcel WWE Scheme (Xcel vs. Ro)
Standout Bar: “Cool, but it’ll be Jeff Hardy when I get there bro/Because they gonna end up with a Broken brother if I get near Ro.”
Intricate reference for the hardcore fans that get it, and old school references. If Xcel had kept going with the scheme, this could have easily been at the top spot. The first two bars of the scheme were some serious haymakers. The Hardy bars/name flip was massive. Xcel’s references are probably the most varied of higher tier spitters.
2. Dallas Cash’s PPV Scheme (Dallas Cash v. Tino)
Standout bar: “No way out, this a Roadblock, he getting tapered/ 6 in a pod, that revolver is my Elimination Chamber.”
The Wrestling, bar god. Cash was correct; most people just use wrestlers or the big PPV names in their schemes and bars. Without reaching, Dallas was able to use both old school and newer PPV titles in the scheme. Had the scheme ended with a bigger haymaker it probably would have been #1 on the list.
1. Gun Titles 2nd Round Scheme (Gun Titles vs. NWX)
Standout bar: “Well that’s what they told us/ If we cremate this bitch, his ashes will be Gold dust(Goldust)”
I felt this scheme in my wrestling soul. Mixing both old school and new school wrestlers, Surf knows his wrestling and adding some Roc influence was beautiful. It was haymaker after haymaker, and it included a personal flip? It was hard to not put this as number one on the best bars list. Tsu Surf and Xcel need to have a wrestling bar only battle.
Wanna give me a chair shot for my list? Spit your bars below, then head over to Twitter and Instagram to follow us @Baselinetimes and @TheHoWPod. Peace.
Senior Editor/Heels of Wrestling